Joonmyun finds his favorite book on the bed one day, knowing full well that's not where he'd left it the other day. He wonders if maybe he'd just forgotten and that he'd really placed it there on the bed for a moment before deciding to shrug it off and just continuing where he left off.
He'd always had this uncanny habit of rereading the books he absolutely loved and adored, which is why he was reading this book for the fifth time that year alone. A sort of giddiness wrapped itself around him at the anticipation of experiencing the same world again. He couldn't help but let it lead him to open the book now placed in his hands.
When he opens the flap of the cover, Joonmyun's heart plummets to the ground or maybe it was his stomach where the acid burned its way through. He felt bile rise in his throat, tears prick the corners of his eyes and anger rise in his every being.
Right in the middle of his favorite book was a heart. Not a drawing but a carving, a carving, of a heart made from the pages of his favorite book. If he bothered turning the pages, there would be a hole in each and every one of them in the form of a heart. He bit back the sob that was threatening to come out of his mouth as he eyes the silver ring in the middle of the carved heart and the small tag tied to it.
If you had taken a look at Joonmyun then, you would have assumed that he was in the part of the book that moved him to tears all the time. But if you looked into his eyes, you could clearly see the anger, the death and emptiness.
He took a deep breath and decided to hold the tears back and read the tag tied to the ring.
It said: Will you marry me? — Kim Jongdae
"Kim Jongdae," Joonmyun seethed. "I'm going to kill you!"
A few weeks ago
Jongdae turns and turns in his office chair and lets his mind wander. He'd been done with his work for a while now so he'd given himself the liberty of a break. It had been out of the blue when his calendar on his phone had alerted him of the wedding he and Joonmyun had been invited to. It was going to be held this weekend and the thought of weddings led his mind to wander along those scenarios.
All kinds of questions went through his mind, 'What would it be like to marry Joonmyun?', 'Would Joonmyun propose?', 'Does Joonmyun think about marriage?', 'What would our wedding be like?'.
Jongdae blushed and buried his head in his hands. He rarely thought about things like these but when he did, it usually meant a great shift in his life. He sighed because this probably meant he was ready to walk down the aisle and that thought scared him for a moment. He didn't even know what Joonmyun thought about marriage. In all the years they've been together, Jongdae thinks it never came up.
Jongdae bites his lip and wonders if he proposed, would Joonmyun reject him. It's probable but slightly impossible. He knows Joonmyun loves him and the number of years they've been together should be sign enough that the next step was to exchange vows. But he can't help the thought that he wants Joonmyun to be the one proposing to him instead.
He shakes his head. He wasn't sure if Joonmyun would so he was going to take matters into his own hands. He was going to propose. He was as much a man as Joonmyun and could definitely propose. So with Google as his best friend, he searches for the perfect proposal.
He stumbles upon the perfect one, one for book lovers and he can't help the smile on his face as he thinks that Joonmyun would definitely love it.
Which brings us back to the present.
Jongdae had appeared as soon as he heard the death threat. He'd been spying on Joonmyun since he'd entered the room.
"Kim Jongdae, what the fuck were you thinking?" Jongdae gulps because Joonmyun never curses and when he does it's either during sex or when he's really really angry.
"I thought you'd love it," Jongdae gives him a sheepish smile as he walks with his hands behind his back towards his lover, who continues to glare at him.
"Love it? You tore a hole in my favorite book Jongdae. Do you know how much this costs? How am I even going to find a copy of this? You know I love to read this, why would you do that?" Joonmyun's breathing in pants, feeling the rage well up and flow out of his system with each rant.
"I'm sorry," Jongdae mutters, hanging his head. He wants to tell Joonmyun he knows and he doesn't have to worry about all that but Joonmyun keeps talking and muttering hateful comments that makes Jongdae want to cry. It's almost as if he didn't see the ring and the note.
When Joonmyun is done listing off the stupid things Jongdae's done, Jongdae lifts his head and looks at Joonmyun with red rimmed eyes and tears slowly falling down on his cheeks. He throws the book he'd been hiding behind him all this time to Joonmyun, making sure to aim hard as it hits Joonmyun on the stomach.
"I just wanted to tell you, I didn't tear a gaping hole in your favorite book. If you'd bothered to check or even notice then you would have known that the book I used to propose to you was fucking new!" Jongdae screams and walks out, wiping the tears away furiously as he goes into one of the guest rooms so he can cry his heart out.
"Stupid Joonmyun, stupid marriage. Fuck this shit, I hate everything. He didn't even bother telling me if it was a yes." He buries his head into the pillows and cries himself to sleep, emotionally drained from the confrontation.
Jongdae wakes up to the smell of scented candles filling his nose and when he sits up, the guest room is lit up with candles all over the floor. 'What? Does Joonmyun want to burn me alive now? After all the years we'd been together? For a book?' He can't help thinking.
He's just about to blow the candles out when Joonmyun appears at the door, looking at his feet and rubbing the back of his neck. Jongdae can't really see his face but he guesses it looks apologetic at the moment because this is Joonmyun's guilty stance.
Before Jongdae can tell Joonmyun to get out, the older turns on the light and soft music starts playing. To make matters worse, Joonmyun starts singing along to the music. It's a song he's never heard of and he knows it's new and must've been self composed. His heart clenches as he listens to the lyrics.
"I wanted to spend
Forever with you.
Wanted to hold you close
And watch you sleep.
Those little moments we had
In the dark or in the early hours
Those are the moments I'd like to keep
Forever is a long time
But with you by my side
I think forever wouldn't be long enough
So spend forever with me please
Let me love you
For as long as forever allows
Let me have you
Until forever tells me to go
So Kim Jongdae
Won't you spend forever with me?"
Joonmyun ends up in front of Jongdae on the side of the bed, bended on one knee and hands on either side of Jongdae's face, wiping the tears with the pads of his thumbs. He plants a kiss on Jongdae's forehead.
"I'm so so sorry," he whispers against Jongdae's forehead. And Jongdae lets out a sob as he buries his head in nook of Joonmyun's neck.
"I shouldn't have said those things and I'm sorry I hurt you, Jongdae. I'm so sorry." He apologizes a few more times as Jongdae cries in his arms. He tries to soothe the younger by rubbing up and down his back.
Jongdae has calmed down but refuses to leave the safety that Joonmyun's neck offers. Joonmyun moves to sit beside him on the bed, allowing his lover to hide himself for the meantime.
"You know, I wrote that song three years ago," Joonmyun says and Jongdae can almost hear the smile on his voice as he says it. He wants to comment but ends up holding tighter to Joonmyun's shirt.
"I wasn't sure if you wanted to get married and I'd always been afraid to ask." Joonmyun gulps. "I wanted to though, but you know I've always been a coward and I guess it wasn't just the book that pissed me off but the thought that you'd beat me to proposing. You proposed to me and I'd been thinking of the perfect proposal for three years and that kind of hit my ego pretty badly." Joonmyun laughs and Jongdae mutters something along the lines of 'idiot'.
Jongdae lifts his head to look Joonmyun in the eyes for a second before pulling him close to kiss him angrily, the kind of kiss that would bruise but didn't because he pulls away just in time.
"I hate you so much right now," Jongdae says voice breaking a little, his grip on Joonmyun's shirt turning his knucles white. "But even so, even after all the shit you pulled, I want to say yes. So yes, I want to spend forever with you, idiot."
Jongdae pulls on Joonmyun's shirt to kiss him softly, wrapping his arms around Joonmyun's neck. Joonmyun returns the kiss eagerly, pulling Jongdae onto his lap.
Jongdae breaks the kiss not because he ran out of breath but because he wants to say, "Yes." And he repeats that for a few more times, emphasizing each yes with a peck on Joonmyun's lips.
It's not the world's most perfect proposal but it doesn't matter, because the wedding will be even better.
♥ ♥ ♥
Kyungsoo is stirring the batter for his newest cake recipe when it dawns on him that he's been living in London for over 3 years now. Three years of being with Jongin freely with no one to judge them about their relationship, 3 years more to his relationship with Jongin that started so long ago that it's been too long to remember without doing the math just how long they've been together. And yet despite the many years they've been together, and the change in environment, Jongin doesn't seem to be looking at their future in the same way he sees it.
He sighs because it had been his idea to move to London. He thought that Jongin would somehow catch on to why Kyungsoo chose London. But it's been three years and well Kyungsoo thinks that maybe Jongin is stupid.
Obviously, all Kyungsoo wants is a ring on his finger and a signed certificate that proves that they are eternally bound to each other until death do them part.
He stops stirring, not liking how his mood might affect the taste of his cake. He puts the batter in the fridge and writes down the recipe that was in his head. When he's finished, he looks at his bakery's kitchen and wonders if Jongin is even serious about their relationship. They've talked about getting married before, but somehow it never came up now that they were in a country that was morally accepting of their desires.
All kinds of what ifs enter his mind, but the worse that comes is 'What if he never proposes?'
Kyungsoo bites his bottom lip and paces in the kitchen. It's not as if Kyungsoo doesn't mind the way things are now but he wants to be able to call Jongin as something more than a boyfriend or partner. He wants to have legal rights to Jongin's things and vice versa. There's so many things that could benefit them if they got married but to be honest, Kyungsoo just wants to call Jongin his husband and he wants Jongin to call him husband.
There's a nice ring to it as he rolls the sentence along his tongue and it makes his stomach churn. And then he remembers that he can't call Jongin husband if they aren't married and they can't get married if Jongin doesn't propose —
And then it hits him.
"Why does Jongin have to be the one to propose?" He asks himself, stopping momentarily in his pacing.
"It's not as if I'm a woman who needs to wait to be proposed to," the smile that slowly makes its way to his lips is one of triumph, "I am a man and therefore I have as much right as Jongin to propose."
Kyungsoo pounds his fist on his palm and mutters some self encouragement before he takes out his batter and begins planning the perfect proposal, one that Jongin will never see coming. And he thanks the heavens for the fact that the coming weekend will be their anniversary, it couldn't have come at a more perfect time to be honest.
With a happier mood, Kyungsoo continues his stirring of the batter. This cake is going to be really special he thinks as he begins the process of baking with all the love he has for Jongin ready to spill sweet promises as a secret ingredient.
Kyungsoo's plan is simple and one that is almost inconspicuous that he knows Jongin will never find out. He buys a simple white gold ring, no diamonds, just an engraving of their names on the inside if the ring joined by a heart. He's going to have to talk to their server about the cake and how to present it because the cake is crucial. He's going to have them serve the slice of cake with this little placard sticking onto it. The placard will say 'Will you marry me?' and the ring will be placed in the middle of the slice of cake.
Kyungsoo wants to squeal, it will be the perfect proposal.
Kyungsoo arrives at the restaurant later than usual but he'd given the cake earlier that day and had discussed the procedure to the people required. His plan was going to commence in full force at dessert time and his stomach was feeling all kinds of anticipation. He couldn't help but smile. He enters the waiting area and surprised to find it almost quiet. He turns to the concierge to ask but the man just smiles at him and leads him to the dining area.
As soon as the doors open, Kyungsoo gapes. The whole restaurant is vacant and dimly lit. All of the tables are lit with one candle each and the concierge has left his side after patting him on the back muttering a congratulations. Kyungsoo is lost, he doesn't know what's going on and Jongin is nowhere to be found.
He observes the restaurant and finally notices the pathway in front of him leading him to the table at the center of the restaurant. His heart begins pounding in his chest when he spots the origami on the floor. He bends down to pick one up and gasps to see a paper crane.
Right now his mind is running with thoughts a mile a minute and he can only hear the beating of his heart and the sound of his breathing. He stands up and unfolds the crane and he can't help thinking, 'Oh shit, oh fuck, is this what I think it is? Is this? Shitshitshit!'
He unfolds the paper crane and it says, 'I wish to spend my lifetime with Kyungsoo.'
He's about to curse out loud when he hears a voice speak along with just the softest touch of melody playing, "Kyungsoo."
Kyungsoo registers the voice as Jongin’s and the song as their song and his heart skips a beat. He looks around and finds nothing and wonders where his boyfriend could be hiding.
"Three years ago we moved to London with all kinds of dreams. I remember getting married was one of them." Jongin laughs and Kyungsoo feels tears prick the corners of his eyes because, 'Is this what I think it is?'
"One year later, I realized that we just didn't talk about tying the knot anymore and I wondered 'What happened, did Kyungsoo not want to marry me anymore?' I asked all these kinds of questions but then one night, as you were asleep in my arms, I couldn't help thinking, ‘This is what I want for the rest of my life.’ It didn't matter if you didn't want me anymore, I still wanted you and would do anything in my power to make you want me back." Jongin's nervous laughter fills Kyungsoo's ears and he walks forward avoiding all the cranes not knowing if he should pick them up or not.
"I'm sorry it took me almost three years to propose but it wasn't easy folding 1000 paper cranes," Kyungsoo gasps and he knows for sure tears are falling now. "Each and every crane has a wish that only you can fulfill, Kyungsoo."
Kyungsoo almost wants to ask how, because he's willing to do anything and everything. He looks at the unfolded crane in his hand and his heart skips a beat.
"Right now there are only 999 paper cranes in front of you." Jongin exits the double doors of the kitchen and walks to where Kyungsoo is.
Jongin looks handsome in his simple black coat and tie and Kyungsoo feels the tears flow like a river.
Jongin nervously wipes his hand on his pants and bends down on one knee. "I have the thousandth paper crane. Won't you take it and read it?"
Kyungsoo shakily takes the crane offered to him. He unfolds the paper crane and almost breaks down crying when he reads the wish.
"Do Kyungsoo, won't you make my wishes come true and marry me?" Kyungsoo crumples the paper in his excitement and throws it away before tugging on Jongin's tie to bring him back up.
"Yesyesyesyes!" Kyungsoo answers as he wraps his arms around Jongin's neck and kisses him.
A waiter appears just as Kyungsoo's peppering Jongin's face with kisses. On his cart is a slice of cake, the cake Kyungsoo was going to use for his proposal and Jongin walks to it with a smile on his face.
"You were going to propose to me?" He asks, turning his attention back to his fiancé, wiping anymore stray tears. Kyungsoo splutters before answering with a small yes.
"I thought you were never going to so I thought I'd do it. I even got you a ring." Jongin pecks him before leading him to the cake and takes the ring.
Jongin laughs as he takes out the ring box in his pocket.
"You know, I got you the same ring."
"No way," Kyungsoo says as he looks into the ring box. He smiles as Jongin wears his ring and pulls the one he bought for Kyungsoo out of the box.
"I'm sorry it took a while but the paper cranes were hard to fold." He apologizes, as he puts the ring on Kyungsoo's finger. "Actually I think I reached the 300th paper crane when I decided I'd just repeat wishes."
Jongin laughs and Kyungsoo hits him the chest. "You're so lazy."
"Well now you're stuck with a lazy ass like me forever so it's really your loss." Jongin jokes as he kisses Kyungsoo on the forehead lightly.
Kyungsoo can't help thinking how it doesn't matter if Jongin is lazy or slow, just as long they get to spend forever then that would be fine.
♥ ♥ ♥
Jongin wants to propose to Jongdae. He's not quite sure yet how he's going to do it but watching wedding videos on YouTube is definitely giving him this urge to propose. He knows Jongdae will say yes and that gets him just a little bit more hyped up to propose.
The problem is Jongdae isn't the type to like or even care about grand surprises. So Jongin scrolls through pages and pages of Google Search results related to 'simple proposals' as well as countless of YouTube videos for grand ones that might appeal to Jongdae.
He comes up with a mix of simple and grand proposals, all of which are screaming flop and failure. He can't help but bang his head on the table multiple times because, 'God, I am so lame.'
Jongin stops searching and gives up for the day when he is still drawing a blank by the time Jongdae has to come home. He can't believe he's spent his whole day off thinking of a great proposal. And yet when Jongdae walks in with that kittenish smile he fell in love with, he can't help but think it's worth it.
The idea hits him almost a week after he'd bought the ring he was going to use. The ring is a simple white gold band with a princess cut diamond right in the center. It's simple and not at all girly and he knows Jongdae will love it.
It hits him then simple, not at all girly. He slaps his forehead as he mutters, "I can't believe I didn't think of it!"
Jongin makes a grab for the calendar on his desk and picks the perfect date. He doesn't think he can wait another week so he settles for the coming weekend, which is three days from now. With his plan in mind, he knows he just has enough time (if not more) to prepare.
The plan is: take Jongdae out on a date and propose to him then. Simple and yet he knows Jongdae will love it.
He'll make up a convincing excuse so they can dress up in suits and eat at a fancy restaurant. He knows just what restaurant to pick and he dials the familiar numbers to Jongdae's favorite restaurant and places a reservation.
The next step is to convince Jongdae of a special reason to take him out. It's trickier because Jongin and Jongdae don't really eat in fancy restaurants without reason. Lucky for Jongin, really lucky, like he'd hit the jackpot actually, he gets a promotion just a day before his proposal and, of course, to celebrate he'd told Jongdae that he'd placed a reservation already. Jongdae had jumped into his arms then and kissed him squarely on the lips and Jongin couldn't wait for tomorrow to come.
Jongin is impatiently tapping his foot as he waits for Jongdae to arrive at the restaurant. Their place is secluded enough to give them enough privacy and Jongin thinks it's perfect. The concierge leads Jongdae to their table then and gives him a thumbs up to tell him that everything is set. Jongin almost misses it because Jongdae in a suit always makes him choke on his own saliva.
When Jongdae sits down, Jongin takes a deep breath and wills his nerves away. He'd planned on proposing right after their meal and he's going to push through with that. So they place their orders and Jongin counts down the minutes to the time he gets to pop the question.
Their meal is almost finished and Jongin can barely chew his food, swallowing most of them whole in his haste.
"Wow, you're either really hungry or the food's really bad," Jongdae comments and Jongin can't help the fake laughter that makes it past his lips. Finally Jongdae frowns and Jongin gulps. He's had a feeling that Jongdae had noticed his behavior but kept quiet about it.
"What's wrong, Jongin?" He asks, tone not at all reprimanding and Jongin thinks it's now or never. He takes a deep breath, a large exaggerated lungful and gets up from his stool. From the corner of his eyes, he can spot the man he'd hired to tape everything posing and he bends down on one knee.
Jongdae is surprised for a moment and he waits with a raised brow at what Jongin is going to say.
"Kim Jongdae, we've been together for a really long time." Jongin takes another deep breath, heart pounding wildly in his chest and he's not even sure why he's so nervous. "And even though I've already seen all the ugly things about you that you could ever want to hide, even then, I still want to spend the rest of my life with you," Jongin says eyes making contact with Jongdae's. He only tears away from his gaze to open the velvet box of the white gold ring and when he looks back up, Jongdae's wide tight lipped smile greets him and the only thing Jongin can hear is beating heart and the whispers of yes on the tip of Jongdae's tongue.
"No," Jongdae says with a smirk and Jongin falters. He almost drops the ring and his mind scrambles to come to terms with what's going on. He splutters incoherently and stutters and he can only vaguely make out the words coming out of his mouth, something like a disbelieving 'What?'
Jongdae barks with laughter and kneels down in front of Jongin so they're eye to eye. He grabs the box of the ring and from this close, Jongin can see the tears forming at the corners of his eyes.
"Of course it's a yes, idiot," Jongdae all but shouts as he takes Jongin's face in his hands. And he whispers a million more times yes before placing kisses all over Jongin's face and just before lips can press against lips, Jongdae whispers, "It will always be yes."
And Jongin is the one who pulls on Jongdae's waist so he can finally claim the lips of his fiance.
♥ ♥ ♥ |
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wheredreamslast2013-10-22 08:06 pm
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onyu's Proposal Fic Challenge. 